Arguing can be difficult to manage, but what does the bible say about it? While there has been historically much debate on this topic, it is helpful to turn to the bible for insights into how to deal with arguments. In this article, we will break down what the bible says about arguing, looking at its teachings and the attitudes that it encourages.
The bible does not explicitly state, “thou shalt not argue”, but it does provide practical instruction on how to handle arguments constructively, and actively promote understanding and building relationships. The scriptures tips for a healthy approach to arguing start with an understanding that people will come to disagreements, but that these disagreements should not lead to destruction. Romans 12:18 reads “if it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone”.
The bible also encourages people to approach disagreements with patience and thoughtfulness. James 1:19 reads “understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry”. This verse emphasizes the importance of listening to other perspectives, and carefully considering how we react and respond to arguments. In addition, the bible advises that conversations should be held in a Spirit of love, as outlined in 1 Corinthians 14:1 “follow the way of love”.
In addition, the bible also encourages better communication during disputes. Proverbs 15:1 reads “a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger”. This verse is a reminder that it is possible to diffuser an argument through carefully considering our language when disagreeing.
The bible also stresses the importance of seeking to understand the other person’s perspective. Proverbs 18:13 reads “The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him”. This verse encourages people to actively seek to understand the position of the other person, as it will be essential to resolving a conflict. In doing so, the Bible promotes empathy, understanding and humility in dealing with arguments.
Seeking Mutual Respect
The Bible also encourages respect in arguments. Ephesians 4:29 says “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen”. This verse is a reminder that we should keep disrespectful language and behavior out of our arguments, and that our dialogue should be aimed at building each other up and coming to a resolution, rather than shoving each other down.
The Bible also emphasizes the importance of humility in arguments. Proverbs 12:15 reads “the way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice”, and Philippians 2:3 reads “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves”. This echo the verses advocating for patience and understanding, as humility is essential for allowing others to have their opinion and for preventing arguments from escalating further.
As this article has shown, the Bible provides much guidance when it comes to dealing with arguments. Its verses emphasize the importance of being patient, respecting the opinions of others, speaking in love, and understanding before responding. These core principles give us the path towards engaging in constructive discussions, which can hopefully lead to better relationships and resolutions.
What About Hot-Button Issues?
The bible provides further guidance on how to handle arguments concerning hot-button issues. Matthew 7:1 states “[d]o not judge, or you too will be judged”. By this, it is meant that rather than judging somebody based on their opinion or situation, we should strive towards understanding or simply accepting where someone stands.
Matthew 18:15-17 offers a specific way that a dispute can be solved: “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses’.If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector”. These verses stress the importance of upholding the principle of loving one another through difficult conversations, emphasizing the need to seek resolution and clarity.
Seeking Guidance From God
The bible also encourages us to look to God for help during arguments. In Proverbs 3:5-6, it is written “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths”. This is an encouragement to seek God’s guidance in all things, including our arguments, and to trust that God will lead us in the right direction.
Philippians 4:6 reads “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God”. This verse is a reminder that we can always turn to God in difficult moments and that we should trust in his faithfulness, rather than worrying or letting arguments intensify. As such, trusting in God helps restore peace during turbulent moments and guides us away from destructive behavior.
Acknowledge Differences and Choose Forgiveness
The bible also encourages us to acknowledge that disagreement and differences in opinion are to be expected, and to choose forgiveness in times of disputes. Philippians 4:2 encourages us to “be gentle and show true humility to each other”. This is a reminder that we can work through disagreements without resorting to agressive or disrespectful behavior when arguing. Further, Ephesians 4:32 states “become kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you”. This verse emphasizes the important spiritual principle of forgiveness, and encourages us to handle arguments with understanding and respect for each other.
Finally, Colossians 3:13 reads “bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you”. This verse is a reminder of God’s grace and mercy down on us, and encourages us to extend this same mercy to others. By forgiving when arguing, we can strive towards peaceful solutions in matters of conflict and restore harm to relationships.
Making Amends in Arguing
The bible also encourages us to try to make amends when we have argued. In Matthew 5:23-24, Jesus says, “if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift”. This verse is a reminder that we should strive to repair any damage after a heated argument and to work towards a resolution. This can be achieved by expressing an apology and striving to build bridges rather than walls.
The bible also reminds us that healing and reconciliation is possible, even after the most heated of arguments. In Matthew 5:44-45, Jesus says “But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven”. This verse is a reminder that we should strive to seek resolution between two parties, even if offenses have been committed.
Approaching Arguing with Love
The bible encourages us to approach arguments with a spirit of love. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 reads “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres”. This verse is a reminder that arguments should be approached with love and patience, and should strive for mutual understanding and respect. If we can approach our arguments with charity and kindness, it will go a long way towards resolving disagreements and healing relationships.
From the verses presented in this article, it is clear that the bible encourages us to be patient, respectful and loving in our arguments. By considering its teachings and striving to uphold its principles, we can strive towards better understanding and respect with those we disagree with, and ultimately towards a resolution.
